Every Difficult Thing About Moving Back Home After a Year Abroad

By far the worst part of a year abroad is that it only lasts a year. In the months before you leave, no matter how nervous you feel, by the time it's time to come home you wish you could stay longer. "Has it really been a year already?" you'll say to anyone who'll listen. You might even put off packing until the very last minute, telling yourself that if you don't pack your clothes, somehow it'll convince your university to let you stay abroad longer.

In the end, the day finally comes when you have to say your emotional goodbyes and go home. Of course you'll be happy to see your family and return to a more familiar life, but readjusting fully to your old normal can take months — or even years. Until then, brace yourself, because almost everything will drive you up the wall.

Everything has changed

Only a year has gone by, but it'll look as though everyone at home competed to change the most while you were away. Dad may have decided to age gracefully by shaving his head and going bald, your sister now has a boyfriend (which, by the way, you were never allowed at her age), and the family cat doesn't seem to remember who you are.

It's even worse in your friend group — breakups, new relationships, entirely new dynamics. Even the area you live in feels different, your favourite shops have been replaced, and your favourite pub has closed. It hardly feels like the home you knew.

You can't live like a tourist anymore

Undoubtedly one of the best parts of a year abroad is being able to treat your accommodation like a tourist stay for a whole year. Every weekend is a mini-holiday, spent visiting local attractions or taking grand day trips somewhere nearby. Everything is new, exciting and wonderfully Instagrammable. Once you get home, it's nothing like life abroad. Now your weekends are dull, tourists get in your way, and overcrowded public transport becomes an all-round hassle.

You miss the friends you made during your year abroad…

Yes — even with Skype/WhatsApp/Snapchat/Facebook/Twitter/Pinterest/Google+/handwritten letters (kidding, nobody writes letters anymore), it's not the same as being in the same room as the friends you met on your year abroad. With every day that passes, you can almost hear your lives drifting apart, and you can't help but panic.

…and you feel less close to the friends you used to know

Leaving the friends you made abroad wouldn't be so hard if your friends at home hadn't all disappeared or completely changed. You've missed a full year of inside jokes and shared experiences, which means in every conversation you have to sit quietly and hope you'll eventually get to tell them about the night you went to a techno club in Berlin. Speaking of which…

Nobody wants to hear your year-abroad stories

That's annoying, because you really do have a lot of good stories from that year. You spent the past year having brand-new experiences and adapting to a different culture, but there's no one to share it all with. Of course you can tell your parents a few of the stories, and they'll listen, but you can't tell them everything because some things you don't want them to know. You can try bringing up any ridiculous story from your time abroad with friends, but they'll roll their eyes or simply stop listening.

You've abandoned all the hobbies you picked up abroad

Living abroad means adopting a whole new lifestyle and trying many new things. Maybe yoga or some other modern form of movement and meditation, or maybe you became an avid photographer documenting your new surroundings. Either way, now that you're back home everything feels dull and grey, and the appeal has faded dramatically. You can't even convince mum to make paella.

Everyone around you says you dress strangely now

Personally, you'd say your sense of style simply evolved from being exposed to another culture. But all your friends just think you look weird.

Your parents won't stop saying how glad they are you're back

Yes, you understand it was hard on them while you were abroad. But if they keep repeating it, you'll start to think you spent the last year in a war zone. When you tell them you're planning to travel again next summer, they'll absolutely crumble.

You now think a lot of things about where you live are really strange

Growing up, you never noticed anything unusual about the place you lived. How could you? It was all you knew. But now your eyes have been opened to another culture, and it's much harder to unsee the flaws. Now everything about your country looks strange or off-putting. You really can't avoid it. From the way people drive and interact with strangers to how they drink or what they watch on TV, everything feels quaint, simplistic, completely and utterly wrong.

Every time you're sad, people assume you're pining for life abroad

Even if they're right, it doesn't help when someone walks up and says, "Oh, it must be so hard, missing all the friends you had abroad. Do you think you'll see them again?"

You still haven't unpacked

And you never will.